Redefining Success

Recently, I read this caption on Alexia Clark’s Instagram, “Goals should never be fully static because we’re all continuing to develop and grow. Once you reach a milestone, it’s time reevaluate and consider what you want to accomplish next. Expect your dreams and goals to be organic, they should evolve with you as you grow.”

And while I agree that goals should never be fully static because we’re always growing and evolving, part of me feels like goals shouldn’t change because of outside circumstances. ::cough world-wide pandemic cough::

When you hit a roadblock that you can’t control, the process of achieving your goals should change.

A few weeks ago, my best friend, Sarah, sent me this article from NPR that talked about how millennials are facing a second recession in their lives.

I couldn’t help, but let out a huge sigh.

Ten years ago this December, I felt the full after-effects of the 2008 recession. I was earning a bachelor’s degree and couldn’t find a big-girl job to save my life. As if things couldn’t get worse, a few weeks after graduating, I had to make the tough decision to leave my much-needed job.

Since my work environment was extremely toxic, my health was declining. Couple that with overbearing co-workers and it was the reason why my evenings were filled with cry sessions and any available alcohol in the fridge. I’d work for a few hours, drive 45 minutes away to attend classes, and drive back to work the rest of my shift and clock out at 8pm only to go home and stress drink.

I had to leave my job even though it was paying the bills.

And if you’re wondering how bad it was, it was very bad. During my first job review at my new company, I explained to my boss the kind of work environment I had came from and that I needed time to adjust to a true professional work place.

I didn’t realize the effects of my toxic work environment until after I had left. That’s how bad it was.

For the last eight years, I worked hard at my day job (surviving multiple lay offs to boot), networked with more people, and finally started building my long-overdue brand.

Then a clean slate in the form of a new year (and decade) began. And just when I thought and felt that things were finally looking up for me, bam!

The pandemic put my dreams on pause and my life at nearly a complete stand still (along with everyone else’s).

And now, here we are again, ten years later, facing another recession.

I had worked so hard to dig myself up out of the 2008 hole only to find myself standing in the quicksands of 2020.

Don’t get me wrong. Being at home during this pandemic has been a blessing in disguise for me. I’ve been blessed with extra time to rest (which has been more difficult than I thought), purge, and organize my life.

However, I can’t help, but feel that I’m being forced to go through the process of redefining success too.

I’m well-aware that society is navigating a new way of working/living. And I know major change is coming for a lot of companies out there. Whether it’s shuttering their doors, filing for bankruptcy, restructuring, or figuring out new ways to work safely on a permanent basis, change in how we work/make money is inevitable.

Since life is rapidly changing with this pandemic, I feel like I have to discover my new definition of success.

One of ten hard questions I’ve had to ask myself again for the last several months has been “What does success mean/look like to me?” And if I’m being honest, redefining success for myself has been difficult.

For the first time in my life, I’m at a loss for words. And I’m not 100% sure I know what I’m doing.

I used to have a fear of success, but now, I understand that I have to build something for myself. Aside from this blog, I’m finding myself thinking about my brand collectively.

I find myself thinking and saying, “I don’t know.” A LOT. And as weird as this sounds, I’ve been at peace, even when everything in my life is uncertain.

While I have no idea where I’ll be day job-wise or how She Sweats Diamonds will evolve in the future, one thing I do know is that I’m not going to give up.

It’s just not in my blood.

How about you? How do you feel about your goals and dreams right now?